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Letter VIII Published – The Master vs The Slave

Letter VIII published on 2nd June 2019.

Here’s an excerpt:

Epictetus said that “no man is free if someone else has the power to obstruct and compel him”. In other words, as soon as we place the control of our happiness into things we do not control, those things become our master, and we become the slave.

Letter VII published – Debts & Lessons

Letter VII was published on 25th May 2019.

Here’s an excerpt:

I’m grateful to understand the importance of this deeper level of gratitude at this time in my life, while most of the people I love and care about are still alive.

Your words have more meaning than any gift you can buy.

The problem with communication today…

The more self-aware I become about my own communication, the more aware I become of how much work there is to be done.

The work is never done.

I truly believe that the one factor that changes communication is true empathy; being able to see what they see and feel what they feel.

Most people don’t have the ability to communicate effectively because they are too preoccupied with protecting their own ego.

The result is emotional unavailability and in turn zero chance of a meaningful conversation and connection taking place.

Unfortunately, most people are going through their life not only blind to this, but blame others for the problems that happen because of poor communication.

If we want more meaningful relationships and conversations, it’s up to each one us to improve the way we communicate; work on and improve how we listen, the words we use and the questions we ask.

Letter VI Published – Stop giving people advice

Letter VI was published on 17th May 2019.

Here’s an excerpt:

When someone asks for help we default to giving advice.

We bring our bias, or experience, our perspectives, our ideals and our expectations to the table. You may have your own desires for that person, but it’s not about you. It’s not your life.

If we want to truly help the people we love, we need to stop telling people what to do. Instead, we must listen deeply to what they are saying, understand how they feel and ask more questions.

25 lessons for living a good life

I have been wanting to start this process for a while now.

To document life lessons for my children, similar to what Marcus Aurelius has done for us in Meditations. Something that’s available for my children even if I’m not around for them.

I wasn’t originally going to publish this, but I thought that it may inspire you to do something similar.

Read the full article over on Medium.

I never replied to your email…

You signed up for my letter, I sent you an automated ‘welcome’ email, you took the time to reply and I’ve never bothered my ass to get back to you.

Sorry for being a dick.

I’m replying to you now.

Not writing the letters really put a mental block on everything to do with the project, and now that I’m writing again I feel completely liberated.

Chris.

Letter V Published

It feels so good to be writing again, and even better to hit ‘send’ on Letter V.

Excerpt:

Gratitude is like a tiny hammer tapping away this black rock inside me, and I’m starting to see the light creeping through the cracks.

Understanding who I am is helping me to be a better dad, a better friend and a better partner. It’s helping me to be more emotionally available to the important people in my life, and without it I’m not sure where I would be.

New writing schedule

Today I start a new writing schedule – something more realistic that I’ll have more chance of being successful with.

I really want to write in the morning, which means I’ve moved the start of my ‘working day’ to 10am on a Monday, Tuesday and Friday.

Even if I get up at 5am, I still can’t really do any work between 6am and 8:15am – this is the time when everyone is getting ready for school and work.

I’ll spend the early morning writing an entry in my journal, and then spend time with my family up until everyone goes to work/school.

From 8:15am I will write, have a short break and then start my ‘job’ at 10am.

This already feels better and more manageable.

Let’s see how it goes.