What am I working on?

I believe that wisdom can only be created through our own action and effort. We do that by exhausting our own resources working on problems, ideas, and asking ourselves tough questions. Here you will find (almost) daily posts of the things I'm trying to figure out for myself. Have a quick scroll through and see if you can find something that interests you :)

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Letter XI Published – Ideals & Expectations

Letter XI published on 3rd July 2019.

Here’s an excerpt:

We look at the people we love and judge their behaviour. We have our own ideals for how we should behave and we expect other people to live up to them. When they don’t, we think they can do better.

We let our ideals become our expectations.

We can’t live like this. We can’t go through each day being frustrated, angry and hateful towards the people we care about the most.

We have to stop wishing for and forcing people to change and accept them for who they are.

Letter X Published – Finding your frequency

Letter X published on 30th June 2019.

It’s been 18 days since I published a letter. In that time I did a lot of writing, but I never made room for thinking about that writing. It’s a crucial step in the process, and if I don’t get/make that time it really holds me back.

Cara gets frustrated with me because I spend a lot of time on my drafts…hopefully, it’ll get easier, but for now, I seem to need just as much time as it takes to write the letter, to get it published!

I hope you enjoy Letter X. The first milestone was Letter I, the next milestone was getting over my first ‘stuck’ moment, and Letter X is the third milestone.

Progress always feels good.

Here’s an excerpt from Letter X:

Think about your self-awareness like a dial on an old FM radio, just like your parents used to own. Over the past few years, I’ve been learning to dial my self-awareness into the right frequency. There’s a still a lot of noise, but there are more moments when I’m tuned into the right frequency and I feel a lot closer to it now that I ever have.

A higher level of self-awareness has helped me to develop a stronger sense of self. I still feel fear, but I understand it better and more clearly.

Letter IX Published – How many books do you have left to live?

Letter IX published on 12th June 2019.

Here’s an excerpt:

What do you think 1590 books look like?

I took a guess that my local book store has 10,000 titles. It turns out that they have 50,000 titles!

Your local library has at least 30,000 titles on the shelf, probably a lot more.

I’ve got over 500 books in my library.

It’s possible to write down 100 books that you would like to read. You could probably write a list of 500 if you put the effort in.

I’m not going to be able to read *all* the books. It’s simply not possible.

So, what do we need to do to cut through the noise and read the right books?

Where’s letter IX? I missed a week…

Letter IX should have dropped into your inbox by now, but it’s not ready yet.

I noticed my time slipping over the past few weeks…this has happened before.

  • Week 1 – Letter is ready to go for Friday.
  • Week 2 – I’m still writing it on Friday
  • Week 3 – Letter goes out on Saturday
  • Week 4 – Letter slips into the next week

I’m not going to let it derail me. I’m going to find a win instead.

I’m going to get back to my original schedule of publishing on a Wednesday evening.

Letter IX is drafted now and I just need to get it into Mailchimp for sending out on Wednesday.

Now I have a chance to really catch up with myself and have letter X ready in advance for sending out next Wednesday.



Letter VIII Published – The Master vs The Slave

Letter VIII published on 2nd June 2019.

Here’s an excerpt:

Epictetus said that “no man is free if someone else has the power to obstruct and compel him”. In other words, as soon as we place the control of our happiness into things we do not control, those things become our master, and we become the slave.

Letter VII published – Debts & Lessons

Letter VII was published on 25th May 2019.

Here’s an excerpt:

I’m grateful to understand the importance of this deeper level of gratitude at this time in my life, while most of the people I love and care about are still alive.

Your words have more meaning than any gift you can buy.

The problem with communication today…

The more self-aware I become about my own communication, the more aware I become of how much work there is to be done.

The work is never done.

I truly believe that the one factor that changes communication is true empathy; being able to see what they see and feel what they feel.

Most people don’t have the ability to communicate effectively because they are too preoccupied with protecting their own ego.

The result is emotional unavailability and in turn zero chance of a meaningful conversation and connection taking place.

Unfortunately, most people are going through their life not only blind to this, but blame others for the problems that happen because of poor communication.

If we want more meaningful relationships and conversations, it’s up to each one us to improve the way we communicate; work on and improve how we listen, the words we use and the questions we ask.

Letter VI Published – Stop giving people advice

Letter VI was published on 17th May 2019.

Here’s an excerpt:

When someone asks for help we default to giving advice.

We bring our bias, or experience, our perspectives, our ideals and our expectations to the table. You may have your own desires for that person, but it’s not about you. It’s not your life.

If we want to truly help the people we love, we need to stop telling people what to do. Instead, we must listen deeply to what they are saying, understand how they feel and ask more questions.