When I was 25 my brother Colin (23) was killed tragically. I know this seems a little morbid with regards to all my previous entries, however stick with me…there is a lesson here, as you have probably guessed!
Two distinct events happened this past week that have inspired this blog: –
- I received an email from Nigel Botterill that got me thinking a little differently about the impact that the death of Colin has had on me.
- I was at lunch with a really good friend, who has far more life experience than me. She was telling me a story about her youngest niece (in her early 20’s), about how she apparently hates her Dad so much that she wishes he was dead! I feel sorry for my friends niece and I think she may regret saying that in the future. But I’m not here to judge other people, I just want to reflect on this situation and how it applies to life learning.
Having a sense of mortality from a young age isn’t something that you’d ever be glad or happy to have, although I think it can at times give you an edge on life.
I was reminded of my own circumstances and how precious time is, especially time with your family and closest loved ones. On reflection, experiencing death at a young age gives you a different perspective on life compared to other people.
Having a sense of mortality has impacted me significantly in two ways: –
- I have to do as much as possible with the time I’ve got…”no fannying about”, as I like to say! You can’t get your time back once it’s gone, so spend it wisely.
- I have managed to develop an amazing resilience to all the BS that takes place around me. I just don’t let things get in my way (more on resilience in another blog).
Losing my brother at such a young age has made me appreciate life and how precious it is. It has made me determined and focussed to get what I want and not let anything get in the way. I also really appreciate the time I have with all my family and friends, because one day the inevitable will take place.
My Step-Dad says “[Of death/growing old]: It’s the one thing we’ve all got in common” and it is so true. Interestingly, he lost an older brother at a young age and his determination and focus is a distinct element of his personality, do you think that’s a coincidence?
I would do anything to have my brother back here beside me. The reality is that I could negatively dwell on this all the time and do nothing with my life, or learn from it and get the most I possibly can out of life whilst I’m here.
Has anything significant happened in your life that has made you more focussed and determined? Do you let circumstances get in the way of getting what you want?